Most of us were brought up with a certain appreciation for current events. And I’d say most of us have a good understanding of how news has evolved over the years from public bulletins to daily gatherings around a radio/TV, to just another outpost of the entertainment business. We were told by teachers, parents, and other adults that it’s important to stay informed—and it is. If you’ve seen Anchorman, you know how great of a parody it is of 1970’s TV news. If you’ve seen the sequel, it gets downright prophetic with its portrayal of the 1980’s to the present.
I would also suggest that most of us fit into one of the following categories of news consumers:
1. Newspaper Nerds — These people think television is a bunch of noise and if you’re not taking at least an hour each day to sip on a hot beverage and read the paper, well…. well just what is this world coming to?! They are proud of their stoicism and down-to-earth disposition. Their likes include hair cuts, footrests, pot roast, and tsk-ing. And for some reason they do not like saying the word “pants.” It’s all “trousers” and “slacks” to these people. It’s starting to tick me off really.
2. TV Pietists — This group kinda/sorta knows that “you can’t believe everything you see and hear on TV.” However, “the news” is a dignified exception. It is a dependable source of all local, national, international, sports and animals-doing-funny-things news. This crowd can’t believe you don’t watch the news if you don’t watch the news. “Don’t you watch the news?? Why don’t you watch the news? You really should watch the news you know.” TVP’s can also be recognized by their bizarre weather fetish. Their TV’s will continuously run 24-hour weather channels all day long. Unless the news is on. Oh, and avoid telling them you get your news from the Internet. They will laugh at you. With angry faces.
3. Social Media (Knee) Jerks — This crowd spends quite a bit of time on Facebook and Twitter. (I’d list other social media sites, but most people who use them are under the age of 18 and aren’t all that concerned with news. That is, unless it’s a meme making fun of a current event. Usually a celebrity-themed current event.) SocMed Knee Jerks are the ones who see things pop up on their “newsfeed” and make a hasty reactions to them. “The President/PM made a statement today? Well, I have something clever and prematurely conclusive to say about that.” “A quarterback was charged with a crime? I’ll tell you if he’s innocent or not based on the few fact-ish facts I’ve read on another friend’s post. Whether or not I like the team has nothing to do with it. (yes it does)” I was guilty of this at least one time. One day I’d seen that Jian Ghomeshi posted information about being let go from CBC and what the circumstances were. Because I liked his radio show, and because he seemed to be so transparent and forthright about the situation, I “liked” the write-up. It was only hours later that everyone had gotten the information that he wasn’t as innocent as his post implied. He was coming across as a nasty, abusive criminal. Suffice to say, I was embarrassed to hear a loved one say that the first they’d heard of the story was me liking Ghomeshi’s post. Oops.
4. Online Semi-Readers — I will admit it. This is me. I get my news from a handful of news sites. Usually it’s a TV news network’s website, and it would be comparable to a TV Pietist if s/he were to watch the first 60 seconds of each news segment. OSRs read the headlines on said sites, click on interesting ones, and read the first paragraph. Maybe the first few lines. Or the first sentence. At least look at the pictures. Then, we bring them up in conversations. Newspaper Nerds and TV Pietists respond in those convos with something like, “Yes, I did hear about that,” and then rattle off all details they’ve managed to commit to memory. But a SMK Jerk or fellow OSR may respond with, “Oh really? What happened?” The answer from a OSR is usually the same: “Ummm, I didn’t catch the whole thing, but I do know that (repeats headline again).” These folks love to brag about their multi-tasking skills. And as you’d expect, in reality they can’t multi-task their way through a wet paper bag. But they sure can show you some great Youtube vidoes. Really really funny ones.
5. Laughing Realists — This group finds the newspaper boring, TV news arduous, and online news difficult to unpack. They get their news from The Daily Show, theonion.com, or Saturday Night Live. Their thought process goes like this: “I may read in history books about Pierre Trudeau. But if I really want to know what he was like and what it was like having him as a Prime Minister, I simply need to watch the puppets from Canada AM from the 70’s. If there’s a new candidate running in a US election, I can find Tina Fey or Stephen Colbert to fill me in.” These people have two common traits: 1) They seem happier than the other types of news consumers. 2) They’re generally better informed too.
Congratulations Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. This is your week.
And the Oscar goes to…
Best Actress: I think it’s about time Gwyneth Paltrow has gotten recognized on this blog. She’s awesome, and no one could pull off a better Pepper Potts than she.
Best Actor: I simply adore District 9, and one of the great surprises in that movie is Sharlto Copley. He was only ever in one other movie before this one, which happens to be a short. So this is essentially his debut on the big screen. How many actors can say their debut was as a main character in a big budget sci-fi flim that got nominated for best picture? And he’s a freakin’ great actor!
Best Quote: Ok, this is a first. Anchorman is so full of great one-liners that we’re going to have to resort to a top ten:
10. “He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo.” — Narrator
9. “There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.” — Brick Tamland (Steve Carell)
8. “Sweet Lincoln’s Mullet.” — Ron Burgundy
7. “Oh Ron, there are literally thousands of other men that I should be with instead, but I am 72 percent sure that I love you.” — Veronica Corningstone (Christina Applegate)
6. “It’s a formidable scent… It stings the nostrils. In a good way.” — Ron Burgundy commenting on Brian Fantana’s cologne “Sex Panther.”
5. “They’ve done studies, you know. 60 percent of the time, it works every time.” — Brian Fantana (Paul Rudd)
4. “I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.” — Ron Burgundy
3. “What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How’d you do that? Heck, I’m not even mad; that’s amazing.” — Ron Burgundy to his pet dog
2. “If you want to throw down fisticuffs, fine. I’ve got Jack Johnson and Tom O’Leary waiting for ya, right here..” — Ron Burgundy
1. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but… I’m kind of a big deal.”
And that’s the blog for this evening. From Joy Carruthers, 3 kids, 4 pets, the loaded dishwasher 3000, and me, Troy Burgundy: have a wonderful weekend. You stay classy San Diego.