An avatar, like in the movie of the same name, is essentially an out-of-body incarnation or personification. In the movie, humans are induced into a deep sleep while their mind controls another bigger, bluer organism. Movies like The Matrix, Being John Malkovich, and the X-Men franchise also make use of this idea. And this makes me wonder: What movie characters would I choose to use as an Avatar? Here are my picks:
Stuart Little. I really didn’t enjoy the movie, but being the size of a mouse and cruising around my house and town with a little sports car would be nothing short of awesome.
Peter Pan. Obvious choice here. I could play all the time, avoid being an adult, and I’d get to fly.
Prince Akeem (Coming to America). This is a great choice considering his wealth. The guy can buy anything he wants anytime. He’s so insanely rich that I’d pick him before even picking someone like Superman.
Fix-It Felix. Oh the screw ups I’ve done that I could now fix with just the tap of a hammer!
Jason Bourne. It’s not his situation I would envy, but his unbelievable fighting/survival skills. Of course, I wouldn’t make this choice unless those skills came with the avatar. I know this isn’t right, but I have to be honest. If I had this opportunity, I would want to go into a seedy looking bar and look for a fight.
Simba. I love animals and the I find the African variety the most fascinating. To embody a lion out in the wild with all other animals fearing me would be such a rush. And I’m sure I’d love gazelle meat.
Spider-Man. I decided to only put one superhero in this list, and surprisingly I choose Spidey over both Superman and Ironman. To me, Superman would be just too much power. The entire world would expect you to bail them out of every bad thing for your entire life. But swinging from web to web in NYC would be awesome! And though I wouldn’t have the omnipotence of Superman, I would have just enough super strength and speed to make life fun, convenient and heroic.
Legolas. Watch him take down the armed Oliphant in LOTR: The Return of the King and you’ll be like, “Yup. Me too Troy.”
The Terminator. The shades, the biker clothing, the kick a$$ motorcycle. I would spend my time in the Terminator’s avatar helping people out, but I definitely wouldn’t want to shoot people like he does. I’d the the one from T2 who listens to John Connor: “no killing people.” Having said that, to go to a little village that’s being terrorized by gunmen and saving the day would be amazing. I think I could handle that.
Darth Vader. This one I chose for the use of the force. I didn’t choose Yoda because I’d rather be tall, dark and breathy than to be a mix of a smurf and an aged green prune. I didn’t pick Skywalker because he’s just too whiny. But looking that cool and having a powerful use of the force. Now that’s what I’m talking about.
Congratulations Avatar. This is your week.
And the Oscar goes to…
Best Actress: Kate Winslet and Daisey Ridley are neck and neck. I guess based on experience I’ll go with Kate in Titanic.
Best Actor: Billy Zane as Cal in Titanic.
Best Quote: “Chewie, we’re home.” — Harrison Ford as Han… aw you know the rest.
I also decided not to go with any of the muppets. They’re amoung my favourite characters of all time, but to have them as an avatar means I wouldn’t merely control them with my hand. I would be one. So that means… yeah…that’s right…no hand for me please and thank you.